The Paradox of Artigo 17 of the Constituição: Why Equality Must Start at the Dining Table

Women often face a tough choice when it comes to tradition and progress. Despite all the changes brought by Artigo 17 of our Constituição, people tend to discredit others when they perceive them to be the causes of the problems that they have caused. I was brought up in Timor-Leste as a youthful female and had to experience a society that was dominated by the male sex. Our government has done a good job of putting Artigo 17 in our Constituição to ensure that men and women have equal rights according to the law. Why should such acts of discrimination proceed in the present world? We constantly blame the system or the men, but we never ask a question that is more terrifying: do we women perpetuate such traditions against our will?

I observe a similar contradiction in my friend's home. His mother is a respected educator and her education gives her a comprehensive understanding of the world but her own home continues to perpetuate discrimination against its members. The brother of my friend receives larger portions of rice during meals. The brother of my friend receives no requests to fetch salt from the table despite his proximity to the kitchen but his sisters receive loud calls to interrupt their studies and fetch salt.

The girls fight but the mother repeats the same excuse, "He is the only son and he will defend you in the future." It is at this point that I discover that this is not due to a lack of love. It is an unfairness covered in love and social norms. The mother believes that she is doing the right thing by adhering to the culture but she is instructing her son that his time and his life come first than his sisters. This type of education instills a sense of entitlement to a son, a notion that he is a king that should be served. Ultimately, such men are brought up with the notion that they do not require to work as long as the women are available to perform the work.

Commonly, what I observed in most of the rural households in Timor-Leste is not the way they are. Some families are now teaching their children to be equal, rather than the traditional method. Others who adhere to the traditional ways do not realize that it is depriving the girl child of her rights. They considered it to be "the culture" or "cooperation". We are not fooling ourselves - "one-sided" assistance has ceased to be a tradition and transformed into a menace.

A lot of women in Timor-Leste are going to school and are obtaining high-level education, but when they go home, they decide to adhere to the adat and not speak up to defend their value. They do not do it because they are not intelligent, but because this is a common practice that has been inculcated until it becomes the most natural thing to do. Therefore, Artigo 17 will continue to be just a piece of talk unless there is still discrimination at the table. A woman must first understand who she is before she gives birth to her child, and she should understand her rights as well as her responsibilities. We must do everything possible to make sure that discrimination stops with us. Our country does not begin with offices of the government; it begins with the decisions that people make.