How my Mother Protected me from getting my Genital Mutilated!

It was the summer in the countryside of Egypt, Sharkia, where we usually spend the summer vacation in our country house. I was 14 years old and visiting my cousin, she was the same age as me and for some reason, she didn't come to play for a couple of days. She was lying on the bed legs wide open with sheer black mesh fabric over her legs! I was confused and surprised!

"What is that, why are you lying like that," I said. "She is a lady now," Her mother answered, "and she has a popo that needs to heal".

Still confused I asked more questions, and my older cousin told me, "She got her genital mutilated because it grew again, she did it when she was young, but it grew again, our neighbor was getting both his daughter and son circumcision, and we requested the barber (this word is used for nurses who do FGM outside the hospital) to pass by". Her words were very clear and straight "We do that to be disconnected from our sexual desire to stay pure and innocent, or we will be always sexually active and bring shame to our family ". I was listening to all this and still don't know what she means?!!

Suddenly, she hit me with the question, "Go ask your Mom, I am sure you had it when you were young, you just can't remember".

I rushed home, my heart pounding, and blurted out everything to my mom. ‘Did you ever do this to me?’ I asked, my voice trembling, she immediately answered, "I will never do this to you or your sisters, I and your father decided to protect you from this, I even stopped talking to your grandma for years because of her insistence to get you mutilated". she then told me about her own experience with FGM, how she felt at the time, and how that affected her marriage life negatively.

I was born in Saudi Arabia, the fifth girl between 6 siblings, 5 girls, and 1 boy. My mom decided to support my father who was working two jobs, she was a French teacher there. When we came back to Egypt, she was a shield from so many bad influences. Raising 5 girls in a world where they see a girl with a healthy sexual desire as a shame, however, my mom always told us, that you shouldn't feel ashamed of enjoying sex with your husband.

I started to read more about FGM and talk to my friends who were defending the idea, linking it with religion and purity, and my mom talking to our neighbors to stop them from doing the same to their girls. One of the reasons our neighbor wanted to get her daughter mutilated was because she thought her inner vaginal lips are bigger than usual, which my mom explained calmly but firmly, "She is still 10 years old, her body is growing! Give her body the time, and she will look normal". Our neighbor talked to both her husband and her mother, Shockingly, her husband supported her in this decision, unlike her mother, the kids' grandmother! but her husband supported her in this and she told my mom, that she decided to stop this practice!

My mom died at the age of fifty-five, exactly when I was twenty-one years old, she put an end to generation trauma! I can't imagine my life how would be if I didn't have someone like my mother, I can't imagine how it would feel if I had to suffer in silence, not knowing how to know my body and the right to enjoy a healthy sexual life. The impact that my mom imprinted on me made who I am now, I am now 35 years old, and happily married, and I grew up to be an outspoken person who is not afraid to advocate against FGM around my circle, or through my work!

Thank you, mom! God bless your soul.