Unpredictable life; all are fighters!

Life; everyone is struggling to find its true meaning, do not know when it will be found. But everyone makes their own definition; in the same way I made too, life isn't easy it has the ability to beat anyone up to death livingly!.

I always wanted to do humanitarian work to pleasing god, but whenever I look at my life I see myself dead-dreamer; because my health condition wasn't well since childhood, when I was in school; from 4th grade to 7th grade my father used to take me to the doctor; because fever didn't allow me to work properly, doctor suggested for the medical tests but always they came out negative, Later for couple of years my fever losted! I don't know where; but I lost.

I am a university student but before coming to university I was seriously ill for one year, as usual the tests were negative in results again. On the other hand I losted ten kg of my weight, I felt serious headaches, I was afraid of things but don't know from which! One day my life took a terrible turn for four days; my younger sister was ill, but my mother took me along her. But what happens there I sat nearby doctor, he asked the symptoms and I told, later on doctor opened the drawer and took out sugar testing strip, I was smiling it will also negative in results, but surprisingly it came out positive, my eyes filled with tears and unable to speak properly, my sister and mother started to cry too. When my sister sat there for check-up I came out of that room and sat nearby waiting room, I was looking here and there observing women's who were suffering too, but my tears was unable to stop! they fall and fall continuously for two days.

We three came home, my mother was crying and hardly she told my father that she is sugar patient! but my father said it's fine it is curable no need to worry; he gave examples of diabetic survival who were known to him. In evening my mother started to complete the mirror work on my dress which she had started couple of days, she made me to sit along her there and tried to divert my mind but it was hard not only hard for me but for her too. The doctor's medicine was of high power and it made me drizzle it all day. Later on she decided to take me to the laboratory the next day for confirmation.

The laboratory man took my blood and said we will provide report next day. And next day it came out negative in results. It was the end of temporary diabetic journey! but it made me depressed and increased the fear of death in me.

I gone to university and was securing good grades, one day my mother bring me to the doctor of nearby city because I was too weak, doctor asked some questions and prescribed some medical tests. I came out anaemic; a similar disease to my name. but belonging to a brown middle class family it was not the big issue to again go to doctor, don't know where that reports are losted! now after 2.5 year I am ill may be worse than ever! small patachies appears and dissapaers on my skin, I feel blurry vision, weakness, severe headache and so on. But this time I am not afraid of death, I am not crying but I am disappointed if I died soon my dreams will be incomplete; people who need me in future will not be able to meet me! I won't be able to change their lives and guide the innocent childs towards the real life instead of money makers! I don't what God has written in my destiny but I think he won't let me to die hopelessly! I am strong enough to chase the dreams; let's battle silently and win; eager to see the God's magic in my life.