Marriage For Women vs Women For Marriage

'He put the ring on you' doesn't make her(the unmarried womanless, it merely makes you the one in-laws can approach..

The statement hung in air, from one woman to another.

It was the usual mistress versus wife discussion but the non wife's women were winning this one as they seem to have all the 21st century advantages. Though lacking documentation and family recognition, they seem to have a real good seat at the relationship table. their seat was so good that many were refusing to give marriage a chance.

Citing many stories of non physical abuse in marriages and oppressive socio cultural expectations, the side chicks, mistresses and girlfriends were more committed to keeping their roles that becoming wives.

Marriage is indeed a beautiful thing but Africans seems to have a different concept than the rest of the world. The emotional trauma testament witnessed by many children is what has laid the foundation for this generation that is quite average to marriages.

It is almost as if they fear the ring more than a lonely old age. But really, why not, a lot of grandmothers are widowed and are doing just fine even with children far and wide.

No one is afraid of that independent lifestyle of grandma but anyone would be afraid of wondering if a rude relative would show up to sow discord or bully.

It would be foolishness to look forward to the pressure of coming in from your 60hours a week job to help with cooking for an event where you are not comfortable enough to have a table for your guests

Why would any self loving person be loyal to another whose hurt and betrayal is supported as a norm and the only encouragement you get when betrayed is to pray and seek strength from the fact that it could be worse.

But a consensus is that men don't turn on you boldly till they have put a ring on you. So if that's the cue that gives a man the confidence to emotionally abandon a woman, then why exactly should a woman who doesn't want to be scorned put herself in the position that men find it easy and comfortable to scorn

To those who think, an apology should be considered when scorned, I would say, we won't have jails if sorry was truly the balm for hurting hearts and mind. Especially when the crime ripples down to unborn generation

What is your thought?